Stonehenged
Bed Ninja
[bed nin-juh] –noun
1. A member of a child society of bedtime mercenary agents, highly trained in stealth (ninjutsu), who indulge in covert purposes ranging from nap-time espionage to mattress sabotage and sleep assassination.
When you’re trying to punch in for a full 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep, living with a bed ninja can be tough. Between Little Dude, Little Sis and all their arm-flailing, face-smacking barrel-rolling, we finally upgraded to a king mattress. It worked. The whole crew can now pile into bed and sleep without fear of being kicked in the baby-maker, becoming a sandwich or having an eye gouged out. Our new Stearns & Foster was our samurai to Little Dude’s ninjitsu.
For a week.
I’m not sure what time Little Dude hijacked us this morning, but I woke up on the edge of the bed with my face being cheese-grated by the plastic-soled feet of his zip-up footy pajamas, while Lady-Friend enjoyed repeated (and apparently unnoticed) headbutts on the other side. The bed geography may sound vague, but the pic above pretty much does the scene justice: At 6:55 AM this morning, our bed was a mussy-haired and sleep deprived recreation of Stonehenge.
Tags: Bed ninja, Little Dude, Little Sis, Stonehenge
very clever and well articulated. just in case you needed a little pat on the back.
Thanks, Jenny. Pats on the back are always welcome– they’re the ego-boosting currency with which I operate.
Well, that and chocolate chip cookies. And pizza. Both of which I’m roughly 15 lbs. and two pant sizes overpaid.